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 Latest
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Diaryland |
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2003-09-30 - 5:08 a.m. Aaaaaaahhhh yea yea ahhhhh I don't even know why I'm doing this song I don't even know how I feel anymore........ god damn it I can't count how many times I been the last one laughing The joke is on me, cause see I keep crashing My life is changing, really weird being here and there But airplane flights and fighting long distance late nights Doing double duty to a girl id love to live for Thinking for ever, last alot, last long then I had planned on Immortal is love, life isn't just a nice portal we go leaping through I dig through dumpsters and rifle through the scraps My spirit is starving, I am sad I just wanted to walk my thoughts off and drink a cup of coffee It seems like I can't sleep anyway, what am I doing here My intentions span a mans attention, they pay me no mind For I am the mother of invention They say an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure But I'm sure my intentions werent pure In fact they acted so brazen That's what forced me to leave this safe haven And now I'm out in the storm having cut off my escape route I slid through the some mud in a make shift rain suit I was soaking wet and drug myself up from the bottom I was shocked by cupids rock, I chased him down until I caught him Grabbed the gimpy infant diaper rash He used to quiver quickly to load love and unload until I started to feel sickly I was head over high heels in love with my wheels in my girlie The road came calling but she left early, now I'm falling into early thought I can't stop thinking I just hope I don't get caught {*faint singing*} aaaaaahhhhhh, I break everything So I broke it off, because I break everything File my love as an abstract art I know I don't support your dreams But I don't mean to be so selfish I'm just overwhelmed by currents of assurance still I'm helpless and hoping someone else will help this coping to be open is an art form, I'm feeling closed in mostly a part from where we came from is part of who's to blame there really nothing nobody can do to ease this pain I'm feeling freezed in rain drops spread across the roof tops I'm hiding undercover until the truth stops speaking With loose lips peaking, gossip starts speaking in tongues There's not a decent soul among them young ones Who just gathered in rapture to pay hommage To the capture of the master We made ship to shore communication You are my first true love but ive lost patience With the endless way we let dependence way of tendency To say I need more space, so please go away Later on the change is on the other side, let it slide Better be hiding the good vibe that I am feeling When not stealing light from your likeness but Like it or not, you let the first shot go And invited the first thoughts of might we be so tired As to be beyond the first aid our state required doo doo do do doo do doo do doo doo doo do {*repeat*} Man... You can't bandage neglected efforts or put band aids on baskets No longer filled with love and now employed as caskets Yes the love is dead, no the love remains Nothing sings the soul as much of what the whole contains When dumped down on this ground below Spread slow at first but then immersed the town in its undertow We can't grow in salt water cried the pretty girls Neither can the flowers bloom When you're in tune your rose pedals in contract with those have settled in their ways They laid down their arms and gave up their glory days Shortly before I walk out this door I took a last look back and still I'm not sure I've been a B minus boyfriend whose character was doubted Who in every fight I had raised my voice and shouted When I wouldn't even have to say a single thing at all But if I strive to keep my silence it will be a lonely fall But if I speak up now and raise my voice above the crowd noise She'll only hear me hollering, she won't feel my footsteps And following the shoes that break dance and exude balance As this real amazing girl with an endless list of talents That's why I'm challenging myself to grow up and spread out If it's meant to be then its meant to be gently Left alone to work itself out... I just need more time FUCK! I don't even want to do this anymore the phone calls, back and forth hello I'm lost, hello I'm found, hello I want you back, goodbye I'm by myself again, I'm really tired of being lonely I'm sick of this........ get out of my head I broke it off because I break everything, everthing I touch turns to dust ooooh why, why would I want to touch anything, anymore {*whispering*} I don't want to go through this again
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