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 Latest
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Diaryland |
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2003-11-08 - 10:30 a.m. Alright. Is masturbation an essential building block of life?? Sometimes it seems it is so. This pain I feel is a pain that is giving me a stomach ache. It's like my body is going through a withdrawl period. It's like my testicles are swelling from a backlog of sperm traffic. I can imagine my sperm saying: "Man, the highway was fine a couple of days ago, but now their must be an accident or something. The road is looks fine, it's up and by god it's up, and it's been up for a good 15 minutes now, we should of been out and gone by at least 10, I wonder what happened?" "I don't know Dale, but I need to get out of this crazy sac of senselessness." "I'm with you there Jed, let's bang on the walls here and get this fucker's attention." BANG BANG BANG "We'll be out into the vas defrens and flying out into the great unknown in no time." "Dale, what's it like out there?" "Jed, whatever it is, let's hope we're not left to crust up somewhere." "Amen to that Buddy!" "Woo-Hoo!" It's like my sperm are having a hoedown in my sac and all the sperm have spurs on their flagella. God damn, I gotta fight it. It just seems senseless to me doing it constantly. It's senseless. It's cold and hollow. It's also hilarious. Case and point, why do you have to put your penis so close to the porno magazine when you jerk off? Seriously, do you think the objectified women part is gonna lunge at your penis if you pump hard enough? And god, look at your face when you're doing it, catch a glimpse of yourself in a mirror or something, it's horrid, AND if you're used to looking at yourself in the mirror while you masturbate, you're a freak! And god, look at all the dumb shit you decide to masturbate too. Seriously, you ever get a VHS tape from Blockbuster or something and like there's some cheesy nudity in this movie and right at that part, it's all fucked up because someone was rewinding and pausing that part over and over? And alot of this porno selection has no taste, girls with 80s haircuts, sitting on horrid looking couches or in some freaky, badly lit set. Wow! Wonderful pornography!
Giving up this sexuality is a hard, uphill battle though and I don't know, the least I can do is prove a point to myself that I can fight the urge and win. I don't get no prize or nothing, but I wish I did. You win the great prize of non-sexuality, you are the first winner that isn't a priest or over the age of 85 to win this award and it's amazing to think you've won this award at the age of 22, the age of "Sexual Prime." CON-GRAD-U-FUCKING-LATIONS!
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