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 Latest
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Diaryland |
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2004-09-10 - 9:58 a.m. Listening to: Pole's first album There was a moment last night where I got nostalgic. Not the kind of nostaligia that you always remember, but the kind of nostaligia that creeps up on you that you totally forgot about. Well, anyways, onto the thing....... I slept to 4:30 yesterday-which is unheard of, I think it was my body responding to all the work I had planned for it when I got up. I've been slacking on my "Shit List" as of late, and I had jam-packed my day off with a copious amount of shit to do and potential shit to do. It was interesting though, instead of just writing all the things down in bullets, I wrote all the stuff I had to do in a planned chronological order and thought about what things could overlap, what things could be done in tandem with other things. So just like the "A-Team", I was lovin' how my plans were coming together. So Nick calls........ "Brian's over, we're getting some beer." "...um I got alot of shit to do....." *Cue Hannibal looking at me in a bear suit with a half bitten cigar, mouthing the word "Bitch." at me.* "We'll pick up beer and come over." "OK." *Cue BA throwing me onto a hood of a big brown sedan.*  Yeah, so the plan fell apart. I was quite displeased with myself. I tried vainly to salvage it throughout the night.......but around 1:30am I realized getting drunk is not a valid form of a salvage operation since I'm neither Native American or Irish. Well, anyways, onto the nostaligia! Nick played an album from my past.....actually, he borrowed it from me maybe a year ago and I totally forgot it, but it was a part of my 13th birthday gift. Now, at the time, I was listening to Metallica "Black Album" and a mix between oldies, R&b, old rock, and hardcore rap. Before the end of the first half of the game, which we were watching in the shed to kick off the first shed drinkin' of the fall, Nick picks up the CD.....  Memories.......before I knew what ganja meant, before I knew what the "1st of da Month" meant, I was feelin' Bone Thugs n' Harmony. The fact the album was probably "the album littered with the most gunshots and grenades blowing up" at the time is what MADE it cool. I remember being afraid of some of the songs, it can get quite grisly in parts and the first track sounds like the song they would play at the gates of hell-car rattling bass, satan laughing, gun shots, and if Bone's lyrics weren't fast and confusing enough, how 'bout tryin' to listen to them played backwards? ........needless to say, it was the coolest thing I've ever listened to at the time. The liner notes were written in backwards in some impossibly readable font that you had to read in a mirror.....fucking crazy. Nick confesses that he sometimes, just out of the blue, starts singing "Mo Killa" every so often, and I can't blame him, it's infectious. So, yeah, it was a waste of a night.......technically.....okay, actually. It was a bizarre scene of men yelling out obscure sports names, facts, and stats, shouting at a football game, and the sexual exploits of Brian who claims he slept with a Mongolian lady chess master and had sex on a chess board. Most of the highlights though were from the loaded question game.......you know the questions that start out with: "For X amount of money, would you do Y?" So check this: -Brian said, for a 1000 dollars! he'd stick his penis in Bobby "Humpin' Around" Brown's ass, but ONLY and ONLY IF he sang "Every Little Step You Take" while he did it. -Now, he was pretty drunk at the time, but then again, alcohol is almost a truth serum in many ways........his fascination with the homo-erotic is well documented-case and point, rewinding and playing back the scene OVER AND OVER in "Harder They Come" the jimmy Cliff story where Jimmy is in prison getting his shorts pulled off him and getting his ass spanked so bad he pees himself. -5000 dollars question, that both Nick and I agreed to do: Change a baby's diaper and taking the dirty diaper and putting it in your face like a cream pie. -1 Billion dollar question that I agreed to: Would you cut your penis off with a shard of glass? (Note, you can take painkillers for this......the question originally called for a fork instead of a shard of glass......which I ruled out was essentially impossible to whittle your dick off with a common dinner fork.......now, thinking further on this, if you stabbed and twisted you could I guess.....but good jesus that would take some time.)
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