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 Latest
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Diaryland |
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2005-06-23 - 3:13 p.m. Okay, this is day 10 of 11 days straight work. I'm a little burnt out. I've been giving old black folks at work jazz CDs of new and old stuff. I keep hearing back from them that they've been playing the CDs at cookouts and at home with positive results which makes me very happy, selecting old favorites and new flavors for the old fellas that actually grew up with the music. At this rate, I might achieve an artificial-made brother status and get in on the BIA meetings with Pete Nice, Paul Wall, and Michael Rappaport. I'm a very musical person and I'm not, it's been something I've been noticing. I'm trying to relate what music means to me and I've found very little of it in my opinion has to do with making it. In a nutshell, I find my affections for music reflect my life in the respect that I remain a good listener. I am a constant data collector and everything my senses can and wants to soak up, it will. I've always had the knack of relation as opposed to creation. I think that's why so many folks find me funny. I can juxtapose almost anything with all too often hilarious results. As far as taking a creation from a beginning point, with a concise thought of expression, want, and ultimate goal, I've done very little in this respect. I have one constant goal it seems and that is to relate, whether it be obvious or not so obvious. I feel as I'm almost a graduated attention-getter whose playing field is of a somewhat grander scale. I even see thin line between creation and relation. Many would argue that the idea of creation relates to all human wants and goals. Maybe even the thought of relation is a more selfless view of creation. What really can be created that hasn't borrowed an element or taken from a source of pre-existing nature, behavior, or things? Maybe my idea of being a relator stems from a fear of stepping forward with clearer and cleaner formed ideas. My aversion to stopping my thought and my information gathering may very well be the culprit in stopping the reflex of the follow-thru. Maybe I've already answered my question who I am and what motivates me. Maybe I love to say maybe, where I'm driving at, I don't know, maybe that's why I like it so much. Well, it's not much of a mystery and it pains me to speak in such final, rigid forming sentences. There's always a way out.....or a way in for that matter into anything. Does it take alot to say? Not really, but I live knowing that the way I live satisfies me to achieve this bare minimum of a goal. I'm beginning to think, we are all relators and creation is merely a natural byproduct of that. You eat enough beans, you will fart.
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