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 Latest
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Diaryland |
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2005-01-28 - 9:44 p.m. So yeah, I told my stomach "FUCK YOU BUDDY!" and just ate whatever the fuck I wanted today. It's like my fat boy stomach shrunk and it's been making weird noises trying to muster back up its' strength back up to the illustrious 5-plate status. Nothing coming back up but nothing "solid" coming out. I'm trying to be as ungross as possible of the whole thing, but on my sickness hermitage, I've been reading shit story after shit story for some odd reason here on my daily reads. I've been living an extraordinarily boring life for the last couple days (if you want to even consider this living) and right about now, being unshaven, underweight *Which is a good and bad thing, fat people love when they get sick, it's mostly the only time they lose weight.*, and living in sweatpants (Which most friends would probably argue-"isn't anything new") for about 3 days.....I'm probably about as sexy-fied as that female "Gyro" Model that you always see on that all too familiar poster ad at that takeout place where you live where apparently, a-Greek-makes-business-selling-Italian-and-lives-the-American-dream-and-discovered-how-to-make-spare-ribs-in-a-pizza-oven-and-"jazz up"-french-fries-and-got-Turks-to-do-all-the-cooking-kinda-place. (Tell me if I'm reaching here people...) Stealing music is productive right? Some crazy kid name dropped all these house cats I never even heard of online and so far, I've enjoyed all his picks. I tried my best to retort with equal hipness naming off old dusty vinyl, but alas, I couldn't beat him because of his UK slang usage of "ACE!" Everything was "ACE!" to this kid. How can you compete when you're still on "Crazy stupid dope" and "gully" and "Deebo?" Many English people may mangle speaking their language with their horrible dental hygeine and centuries of putting up with drunken slurring that it has been customary in their society, but hey that's where Shakesphere came from, right? I did no reading, surprisingly. I let TV rot my brain, I even know the exact second in which it started rotting: Watching ESPN2's TRICK SHOT BILLIARDS FINALS.  ...and when I said to myself "Mike Massey is a bad muthafucka..." Yeah, that's the exact time you could of scooped my brain out and throw the over-ripened mind fruit and feed it to the orangutans. I did have a weird ass dream last night. I had a dream I went to this show, and Bob Log III was a surprise act and some shitty band was playing. The band just mysteriously disappeared shortly after Log's set and everyone left and I was sitting on a weird couch watching something like "Last Action Hero" or worse and I watched it 2/3's of the way through out of respect, because I thought it was the show and I was the only one left and the movie got to a part I didn't need to see again and I left to the back room. The back room was my parent's old bedroom in our Ft. Hood government home and Bob Log III was still hanging around and I was like, "Yeah, I gotta hit up an ATM and buy alot of your shit." And he was cool with that and then we started playing Sega Tecmo bowl or something and there were 2 Miami teams and I was kicking his ass 34 to 17. .......who said dreams have to be cool and end great? ....asses. It's been awhile since I've created new slang, so please feel free to pass this slang along and make a movement: E.N.O-it means "Envy of No One" Feel free to use this terminology whenever someone spurts out worthless facts and totally geeks out on you and speaks like a Dennis Miller monologue. N.G.L.T- "Not Getting Laid Tonite" closely related big brother of the E.N.O type. Usually wears stormtrooper outfits to parties and on halloween and more then 60% of their worthless knowledge involves a mixture of anime and video games. Hey, furthermore, if anyone is scared of Dakota Fanning, you should get the "bitch-juice" extracted from your dandy-foppin' ass!
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